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virgingirl
Newbie
Posts: 1
Registered: 12-16-2004 Location:
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posted on 12-17-2004 at 00:03 |
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anal sex
Hi I am 14 yo , I want to stay a virgin, my boyfriend understands but suggest we have anal sex instead. At first I thought is was perverted. But he has shown me plenty of articles about anal sex. So I started to think about it. Since I can not get pregnant it sounded interesting. Is anal sex safe? If I dont not have penetration in my vagina and my hymen stays intact, am I still a virgin?
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guyvirgin1977
Member
Posts: 61
Registered: 10-03-2004 Location: Springfield Missouri
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posted on 12-17-2004 at 04:56 |
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ANAL SEX IS DEFINITELY SEX! If you have sex you loose your virginity. UNLESS YOU ARE NIAVE ENOUGH TO BELIEVE THAT ALL GAY GUYS ARE VIRGINS!!!! You can get all SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASES THROUGH ANAL SEX!
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guyvirgin1977
Member
Posts: 61
Registered: 10-03-2004 Location: Springfield Missouri
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posted on 12-17-2004 at 05:01 |
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I already posted this under "should I wait ?"but I think it will certainly answer your question so I will post it again here
Alright, take a deep breath and say it with me: "Oral SEX."
Ever since the whole Bill Clinton/Monica Lewinsky thing, oral sex has been on everyone's lips (excuse the pun). The Clinton scandal raised a bunch of issues: Is oral sex considered "sex"? If you have oral sex, but "don't go all the way" (have vaginal intercourse), are you still a virgin? And is oral sex safe or can it pass infection? (More on that later . . .)
According to some recent studies, most teenagers define "sex" as vaginal intercourse they don't consider oral sex to be "sex." This isn't surprising, since that's how our culture has traditionally defined sex (which, incidentally, leaves out gays and lesbians altogether). So, there are a lot of self-proclaimed virgins out there who haven't "gone all the way," but will do "everything else but," including oral sex.
The abundance of these "technical virgins" definitely has a lot to do with how society views virginity as a really big deal, especially for girls. Whether you lose your virginity on prom night or on your wedding night, it's your first time and it'd better be perfect and with the "right" person
It is true that some people believe that an intact hymen is proof of a woman's virginity. But many people don't believe the condition of the hymen is adequate for defining virginity. They know that it's possible for a woman's hymen to become stretched open even if she's never had vaginal intercourse.
Many teens say that "having sex" is considered slutty, but "just fooling around" is no big deal. Whether you're having intercourse or "just" outercourse sex play that doesn't involve vaginal intercourse, like oral sex many of the same issues apply.
Despite what some people might think or say, oral sex does count because just as with intercourse, there can be emotional and physical consequences to consider.
When we talk about risk, it's often in reference to physical issues like sexually transmitted infections and pregnancy. But like intercourse, outercourse is sex play that also involves emotional risks. Will having oral sex change how you think about yourself and about your relationship? Will you expect more commitment or emotional closeness from your partner? Will you be doing it for the wrong reasons like, because you think everyone else is doing it or because your partner is putting pressure on you?
It's true that if someone is only having oral sex, there's no worry about getting pregnant. But the physical risk of contracting a sexually transmitted infection is there. Studies show that teenagers, and the majority of adults, rarely use protection a condom or dental dam when having oral sex. Why? Explanations range from, "What's the point?" to, "I don't think it's a high-risk activity."
The risk of contracting a sexually transmitted infection from oral sex is lower than it is from vaginal or anal intercourse but there's still a risk. There are only a few cases in which people may have contracted HIV through oral sex. But infections such as gonorrhea, syphilis, and herpes can be transmitted by having unprotected oral sex, too.
When it comes to oral sex, if you're not with a partner whom you know does not have an infection, then using protection during oral sex is key to reduce the risk of passing infection.
And all of this applies not only to teenagers, but also to everyone including the president of the United States.
how many believe that no matter what sexual acts you engage in, you can still consider yourself a virgin as long as a penis doesn't enter your vagina?
It seems that maybe the rules are loosening a bit on this one, with some people being convinced that oral sex is not sex. In other words, you can blow the entire football team, deal out a few thousand handjobs, receive oral until you're raw, and even go for the occasional anal sex, but still say you're a virgin, if it's only by the slimmest of technicalities?
So do you think that even if a girl has a five-some--- gives a blowjob to a one, whilst simultaneously giving hand jobs to two strangers while getting shagged up the butt by the fourth , she has the right to consider herself a virgin? Is there really anyone out there delusional enough to think that she is a virgin?
Let's be honest. Any time a penis is inserted into ANY bodily orifice, or genitals come into prolonged physical contact with someone's mouth, virginity is lost. Granted, it's not quite the same as going "all the way," but it IS sexual contact, there IS insertion of some kind or another, and there is, ideally anyway , some kind of orgasm.
If you still aren't convinced then please answer these questions yes or no.
Are lesbians who have been given oral sex till they are raw still virgins?
Are homo men who get it up the butt till they are bloody still virgins?
What we've managed to do to virginity would be like rewording the Ten Commandments so that everyone feels that they haven't really committed any sins.
There are those women that believe that if they perform oral sex on every boyfriend they've ever had, and let him get his fingers sticky every now and then, that they're still virgins. Now they may bleed a bit the first time they have sex, but are they really virgins?
They have experience. I mean if she just lies there the first time you insert your member, but can play the flute on your instrument like she's written symphonies, has she really maintained her purity? At what point do we draw the line? When has the line between purity and experience been crossed?
I personally don't think that a girl who can inhale a kielbasa like it's a toothpick necessarily connotes the virgin type. If virginity lies in a hole and is not about experience, then our society has a very warped definition of what virginity really is.
Believe it or not, there are gals out there who will let you get into their anal canals, but will still aver that they are virgins. Anal sex, as well as oral sex (despite what Clinton says), has the word "sex" attached to it because that's exactly what it is. And once you have sex, you are no longer a virgin. Case closed.
So these women are under the illusion that as long as their vaginas remain untouched by the almighty penis, they can still claim to be pure. Pure crud, that is. And if men seem to think that this is a viable argument, then they're just horny and have no qualms about taking the back way in.
If you have had oral or anal sex already and you are thinking That you might as well go and have all the sex you want because you are not a virgin anyway, please rethink this. You can become a recycled virgin at anytime. You can have a second chance at being a born again virgin. Start really saving yourself for marriage from this point on. Then when you get married 3 years, 4 year, 10 years from now you can look at your spouse on your wedding night and say "I've waited for you for X amount of years. I've shown discipline in my life I can be trusted" Now that is special.
In a world were 7 out of 10 married couples under the age of 40 have some sort of infidelity you need spouse you can trust. What you do now is very indicative of what anyone can expect of you in the future.
If you don't control your sexuallity now why would anyone believe you would in the future?
I myself am a 27 year old virgin now and I only date virgins or time proven born again virgins who have been completely abstinent a minimum of 2 years, It might have to be longer depending on their previous sexual experience.
Anyone can change but sometimes you have to prove you have changed.
TRUE LOVE WAITS!
Any Questions? feel free to email me cheesguy1977@yahoo.com
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guyvirgin1977
Member
Posts: 61
Registered: 10-03-2004 Location: Springfield Missouri
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posted on 12-17-2004 at 05:07 |
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If you have already commited an act that made you loose your virginity that DOES NOT mean that you have to be obligated to keep doing those things (or more)
You can become a born again virgin at any time! I'm not as concerned with what you have done before you read this I am really concerned with what you do after you read this.
Here is a website that will help you if you wish to become a born again virgin http://www.geocities.com/thevirginclub/Secondary.htm
I also like this one if you have time-
http://www.lovematters.com/truelovewaits.htm
For those of you who are thinking- Jeremiah, You don't understand if I go back to my boyfriend and/or girlfriend and telll them- "I want the realationship, I don't want to break up..... but I don't want the sex"- they'll dump me!...... Well if that is the case what is your realationship based on??????...It's based on sex. Do you want a relationship based on sex?
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Patty
Newbie
Posts: 3
Registered: 12-21-2004 Location:
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posted on 12-22-2004 at 01:27 |
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After reading this posting I decided to give it a try. I am 16 but did not want to break my hymen yet. WE have been dating for a long time and he has been very patient with me. I dont like the idea of oral sex. The thought of it grosses me out. So I decided to let my boyfriend of 17 try it. He promised to be gentle. He took it slow and it was very uncomfortable at first. But after a while I got use to it. Then I could not believe it , I suddenly had an orgasm. It was unbelievable. I never had one before and I did not know you could have one from anal sex. When I had my orgasm by boy friend also had his. He said when I came my rectum contacted over and over. He said it was incredible. I think we have now found a happy solution.
Patty
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guyvirgin1977
Member
Posts: 61
Registered: 10-03-2004 Location: Springfield Missouri
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posted on 12-22-2004 at 06:42 |
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I don't believe you read this posting, If you did you would already know that anal sex still causes you to loose your virginity. I don't know what you think you found a "happy sollution" to, Sex is sex whether it is anal, oral, or vaginal. You need to actually read the posting.
If you want to save yourself for marriage then save yourself for real, virginity doesn't depend on the hole. You can still save yourself from this point on and be a recycled virgin.
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Patty
Newbie
Posts: 3
Registered: 12-21-2004 Location:
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posted on 12-24-2004 at 07:47 |
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I never said I wanted stay a virgin or I wanted to save myself for marriage.
I only said I did not want to break my hymen yet. Now I enjoy sex and I do not have to worry about getting pregnant. Did you read my posting?
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guyvirgin1977
Member
Posts: 61
Registered: 10-03-2004 Location: Springfield Missouri
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posted on 01-01-2005 at 03:27 |
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There are so many diseases they aren't talking about, """"At least 50
percent of sexually active men and women acquire genital HPV infection at
some point in their lives. By age 50, at least 80 percent of women will
have acquired genital HPV infection."""" If you don't believe me here
is the website I copied and pasted it off of-
http://www.cdc.gov/std/HPV/STDFact-HPV.htm
-That's only one STD not to mention the other 29! I won't put you to
sleep with the rest (unless you want me to next letter) The thing that
most sexually active people don't realize is that.. most STDs can be
"silent," causing no noticeable symptoms. These asymptomatic infections can
be diagnosed only through testing! (which they don't get)
You are worried about pregnancy? Did you know you are four times more likely to get a disease than get pregnant?
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Onlyme
Newbie
Posts: 6
Registered: 03-28-2005 Location:
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posted on 04-04-2005 at 17:14 |
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Patty - posted on 12-24-2004 at 07:47 AM
I never said I wanted stay a virgin or I wanted to save myself for marriage.
I only said I did not want to break my hymen yet. Now I enjoy sex and I do not have to worry about getting pregnant. Did you read my posting?
I know this is an old topic but it's kind of confusing for me..
You don't want to stay a virgin but also don't want to break the hymen? If you're virginity means nothing to you then how come your hymen does?
If the only worry here about having sex is the fear of falling pregnant; there is such things as condoms and birth control avialable.
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guyvirgin1977
Member
Posts: 61
Registered: 10-03-2004 Location: Springfield Missouri
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posted on 04-07-2005 at 06:37 |
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A simple piece of latex is hardly enough protection from pregnancy or disease. Especially HPV which kills more women from cervical cancer than AIDS.... birth control involves hormones which makes you far more likely to get an STD...... THE ONLY SAFE SEX IS A SAFE PARTNER-
Safe partner = someone who has never had sex, or someone who has been completely abstinent for 3 years and has been tested for all stds for those three years......like I said before most people who have stds have "silent" ones and don't know it!
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Onlyme
Newbie
Posts: 6
Registered: 03-28-2005 Location:
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posted on 04-07-2005 at 17:28 |
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Granted the only guaranteed way of not contracting an STD or falling pregnant is to be abstinent, however for those who chose to have sex and unsure of their partner's history, it's better to use a condom rather than not using one at all. Even though condoms are not 100% effective, they do reduce the risks alot.
Birth control involves hormones which increase the risk of STDS? I think you'll find that it was only ever one type of birth control that has been said to increase risk of STD; the 3 monthly injection Depo-Provera even then I don't think it was ever proven to be conclusive.
There are other forms of birth control avialable that are safe, If there are concerns all you need do is consult a doctor. For Females that are sexually active and don't want to fall pregnant, it's a good idea to use birth control.
You should use a condom especially when having anal sex as it is easier to get an STD through anal sex. The anal doesn't have it's own natural source of lubrication and can tear easily which makes it easier to contract STDS and also there is germs and bacteria in the rectum which can cause infections if tearing occurs.
Not everyone is going to chose abstinence and we shouldn't judge them for their choices. When some one young ask for advice about sex and has made it clear that abstinence isn't what they want, we should make them aware of the risks and the responsibility that comes with being sexually active other than that it's in their hands.
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Flipper
Junior Member
Posts: 19
Registered: 01-14-2005 Location:
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posted on 04-08-2005 at 08:20 |
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Whoa, it seems you poor girls are getting flamed here.
I fully respect that there is an ideal of no sexual activity if you want to call yourself a virgin. But, if you choose to save your hymen for marriage, the right guy, or whatever, that is also something that should be respected.
Don't let anyone put you down for saving your hymen, no matter what else you do that they might not like!
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guyvirgin1977
Member
Posts: 61
Registered: 10-03-2004 Location: Springfield Missouri
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posted on 04-08-2005 at 11:26 |
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Anal sex is sexual activity, I've already proven that!
I've already proven that oral sex and anal sex are still sex...but since you didn't read it, I'll post it again....please read it this time...
Alright, take a deep breath and say it with me: "Oral SEX."
Ever since the whole Bill Clinton/Monica Lewinsky thing, oral sex has been on everyone's lips (excuse the pun). The Clinton scandal raised a bunch of issues: Is oral sex considered "sex"? If you have oral sex, but "don't go all the way" (have vaginal intercourse), are you still a virgin? And is oral sex safe or can it pass infection? (More on that later . . .)
According to some recent studies, most teenagers define "sex" as vaginal intercourse they don't consider oral sex to be "sex." This isn't surprising, since that's how our culture has traditionally defined sex (which, incidentally, leaves out gays and lesbians altogether). So, there are a lot of self-proclaimed virgins out there who haven't "gone all the way," but will do "everything else but," including oral sex.
The abundance of these "technical virgins" definitely has a lot to do with how society views virginity as a really big deal, especially for girls. Whether you lose your virginity on prom night or on your wedding night, it's your first time and it'd better be perfect and with the "right" person
It is true that some people believe that an intact hymen is proof of a woman's virginity. But many people don't believe the condition of the hymen is adequate for defining virginity. They know that it's possible for a woman's hymen to become stretched open even if she's never had vaginal intercourse.
Many teens say that "having sex" is considered slutty, but "just fooling around" is no big deal. Whether you're having intercourse or "just" outercourse sex play that doesn't involve vaginal intercourse, like oral sex many of the same issues apply.
Despite what some people might think or say, oral sex does count because just as with intercourse, there can be emotional and physical consequences to consider.
When we talk about risk, it's often in reference to physical issues like sexually transmitted infections and pregnancy. But like intercourse, outercourse is sex play that also involves emotional risks. Will having oral sex change how you think about yourself and about your relationship? Will you expect more commitment or emotional closeness from your partner? Will you be doing it for the wrong reasons like, because you think everyone else is doing it or because your partner is putting pressure on you?
It's true that if someone is only having oral sex, there's no worry about getting pregnant. But the physical risk of contracting a sexually transmitted infection is there. Studies show that teenagers, and the majority of adults, rarely use protection a condom or dental dam when having oral sex. Why? Explanations range from, "What's the point?" to, "I don't think it's a high-risk activity."
The risk of contracting a sexually transmitted infection from oral sex is lower than it is from vaginal or anal intercourse but there's still a risk. There are only a few cases in which people may have contracted HIV through oral sex. But infections such as gonorrhea, syphilis, and herpes can be transmitted by having unprotected oral sex, too.
When it comes to oral sex, if you're not with a partner whom you know does not have an infection, then using protection during oral sex is key to reduce the risk of passing infection.
And all of this applies not only to teenagers, but also to everyone including the president of the United States.
how many believe that no matter what sexual acts you engage in, you can still consider yourself a virgin as long as a penis doesn't enter your vagina?
It seems that maybe the rules are loosening a bit on this one, with some people being convinced that oral sex is not sex. In other words, you can blow the entire football team, deal out a few thousand handjobs, receive oral until you're raw, and even go for the occasional anal sex, but still say you're a virgin, if it's only by the slimmest of technicalities?
So do you think that even if a girl has a five-some--- gives a blowjob to a one, whilst simultaneously giving hand jobs to two strangers while getting shagged up the butt by the fourth , she has the right to consider herself a virgin? Is there really anyone out there delusional enough to think that she is a virgin?
Let's be honest. Any time a penis is inserted into ANY bodily orifice, or genitals come into prolonged physical contact with someone's mouth, virginity is lost. Granted, it's not quite the same as going "all the way," but it IS sexual contact, there IS insertion of some kind or another, and there is, ideally anyway , some kind of orgasm.
If you still aren't convinced then please answer these questions yes or no.
Are lesbians who have been given oral sex till they are raw still virgins?
Are homo men who get it up the butt till they are bloody still virgins?
What we've managed to do to virginity would be like rewording the Ten Commandments so that everyone feels that they haven't really committed any sins.
There are those women that believe that if they perform oral sex on every boyfriend they've ever had, and let him get his fingers sticky every now and then, that they're still virgins. Now they may bleed a bit the first time they have sex, but are they really virgins?
They have experience. I mean if she just lies there the first time you insert your member, but can play the flute on your instrument like she's written symphonies, has she really maintained her purity? At what point do we draw the line? When has the line between purity and experience been crossed?
I personally don't think that a girl who can inhale a kielbasa like it's a toothpick necessarily connotes the virgin type. If virginity lies in a hole and is not about experience, then our society has a very warped definition of what virginity really is.
Believe it or not, there are gals out there who will let you get into their anal canals, but will still aver that they are virgins. Anal sex, as well as oral sex (despite what Clinton says), has the word "sex" attached to it because that's exactly what it is. And once you have sex, you are no longer a virgin. Case closed.
So these women are under the illusion that as long as their vaginas remain untouched by the almighty penis, they can still claim to be pure. Pure crud, that is. And if men seem to think that this is a viable argument, then they're just horny and have no qualms about taking the back way in.
If you have had oral or anal sex already and you are thinking That you might as well go and have all the sex you want because you are not a virgin anyway, please rethink this. You can become a recycled virgin at anytime. You can have a second chance at being a born again virgin. Start really saving yourself for marriage from this point on. Then when you get married 3 years, 4 year, 10 years from now you can look at your spouse on your wedding night and say "I've waited for you for X amount of years. I've shown discipline in my life I can be trusted" Now that is special.
In a world were 7 out of 10 married couples under the age of 40 have some sort of infidelity you need spouse you can trust. What you do now is very indicative of what anyone can expect of you in the future.
If you don't control your sexuallity now why would anyone believe you would in the future?
I myself am a 27 year old virgin now and I only date virgins or time proven born again virgins who have been completely abstinent a minimum of 2 years, It might have to be longer depending on their previous sexual experience.
Anyone can change but sometimes you have to prove you have changed.
TRUE LOVE WAITS!
Any Questions? feel free to email me cheesguy1977@yahoo.com
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Mr. Respectable
Newbie
Posts: 5
Registered: 05-15-2005 Location:
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posted on 05-15-2005 at 08:16 |
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Okay all but one of you who have replied are idiots. first off mr. 1977 theres a good reason your a virgin, and believe me its not because you choose to be. >:)
second, i do respect that you choose the idiotic solution of Self-Denial. but does it give you the right to act like assholes (haha good use on this subject) and shove it in this poor girls face, who btw came to you goddamn people for help. NO it doesn't.
get a life losers and btw im sure god has more important things to do than to make people virgins "again."
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guyvirgin1977
Member
Posts: 61
Registered: 10-03-2004 Location: Springfield Missouri
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posted on 05-23-2005 at 23:26 |
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!
I'm curious why you can never really address anything I say, I'm kind of curious whether you even read what I write.
You always write these 2 or 3 liners that never give any proof for anything.
Anyway I don't know about you, but I wouldn't want to be husband number 20 to somebody that had been married 19 times before.
How special would I be? Oh wow I get to be husband number 20, oh wow that is so special.
Since I can't tell that you actually read what I have already proven, plus, I think you need to be reminded what makes gold valuable...........but don't worry I'll get to that shortly.
You obviously don't grasp the concept that once you have sex you are no longer a virgin. Now let me define a virgin for you -A person who has not experienced sex. That is a virgin not your twisted definition- Bill Clinton.
As far as your statement- "mr. 1977 theres a good reason your a virgin, and believe me its not because you choose to be." is hilarious I'm in better shape than the majority of 18 year olds, I'm part owner of a mixed martial arts academy, plus I lift weights.
The reason I only
date virgins or born-again virgins of at least two years is because
I've learned with experience that only virgins rally understand how
precious sex is. I've learned that the other women will talk like the
understand it but in the end the prove they are just like the others, I even
had two of the non-virgins I dated try and force me to have sex with
them, But of course the didn't get to far.
Anyway, I've had some women get offended and say a whole lot of stuff
to me when they find out I only date virgins. Your material is
definitely nothing new. As far as being a boy until you have sex, that is the
pinnacle of stupidity. Do you know what makes gold valuable? Because it
is rare. The reason dirt is worthless is because it is everywhere we
go, it's all around us, the poorest Somalian in the country can reach
down and pick up a handful of dirt.
The same goes for women. I can go and pick up a normal woman just by
hanging out, at any mall, grocery store, club, or bar. No telling how
men they have said "yes" to (when it comes to sex). But finding a woman
who will say "NO! I'm waiting for my future husband" now that is rare.
Now that is a woman worth alot! That is a woman that can be trusted in a
world where 7 out of 10 married people under the age of 40 admit to
having sexual contact with someone other than their spouse.
If you say yes to every guy that you date, then your yes means nothing
when you say it to your future husband.
But... If you say no to every guy that asks you, and you say yes to
your future husband, now that is special. Your virginity is the most
infinitely valuable thing you can give to anyone.
So is taking advice from a virgin who actually understands the value of sex a bad idea? I don't think so.....
You see God invented sex. He invented it not us. He set the boundaries down
because he wants the best for his children. That boundary is marriage. Do
you know that 3 major universities (University of Boston, University of
Chicago, and UCLA) did a study costing five million dollars to find out
who is having the best sex in this country? They went into great detail on these studies including how often
these women reach the Big "O" ...........Do you know what every
single study found? Does you know who has the best sex in America????..................... Christian Married Monogamous (monogamy does not mean
one at a time it's one partner for life) Women!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Yeah they have the best
sex. That study had a whole lot of people dropping their chins. Rolling
Stone magazine was freaking out. The study ended up being called
"Revenge of the Church Ladies"
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